Growing old and being single

As a family, we are helping our dad trapse through the part of life that hits a person in the face without any warning, the natural stages of growing old.  My mother died almost 4 years ago which left my dad “single” again. Of course he doesn’t think of it in those terms, he may think of it as living or being alone.  It is harder to be alone when you get older.  It is nice to have someone around that can help you when growing old has taken you by storm and left you riding on a train that is out of your control. 

I think about growing old alone.  I now have a boyfriend and it is nice to know someone will be there in case I need help in my later years.  However, nothing is permanent and who knows what will happen to me if something drastic creeps up on my and leaves me alone again.  It helps to have children, knowing they can help when things get hard.  However, in our culture, the children try and take care of their parents the best they can without interrupting their lives too much.  I would have my dad live with us in a heartbeat if I had a house that could accommodate all of us.  But my dad I think wants some independence but also he wants to make sure his basic needs are taken care of.  He is now in assisted living and who knows if that will be permanent.  I hope someday he will be able to go home, be independent again and live contently. 

I wonder if the question crosses many older singles minds of who will take care of me ?  What about you?  Do you think about growing old alone?  Is it a worry or something that you wonder about?  Just wondering.

Where have I been?

Hello everyone,

I’m sorry for my absence.  I have been caught up in furthering my career and going to school for dealing craps.  I work in a casino and I’m a cashier now, so I’m working towards getting out of the cage and dealing craps.  Doesn’t sound like too noble of a career, helping people gamble, but it is a place for people to have fun, play games and get away from their lives and the world.  Also, I’ll be playing games for a living which is one thing I love to do.  My mom would always be asking us kids to play games with her, may it be backgammon, solitaire, hearts, spades, pinocle, you name it, we played it.  So I get to play games for a living and I hope to make a good living with it. 

So therefore, I’ve been so busy working and going to school that I’ve been neglecting my blog.  I am back at it now and I will continue my views on the single life.  I love it when people write back so I know that I’m on the right track or let me know if my views are out of whack.  So you will be hearing more from me and I hope to hear from you as well.

Have a great summer!!!!!!

Is there really someone for everyone?

Face it, some single people are quirky(not you, right?)  Well, they can be.  Especially the older they get, the more they are set in their ways.  They like to do things a certain way, cook a certain way and do things when they want.  They may even be picky about their stuff and how to maintain it or use it.  So how is it possible to find someone who you will get along with? 

Someone said to me once that made so much sense.  She said, “you have to find someone with the same kind of crazy as you”.  And I don’t mean that in a bad way or in a way that means you need to date someone who is mentally ill (although mentally ill people are a viable part of society and have the same chances in meeting someone).  I mean, when you date someone, there has to be some common ground,  that you understand why this person does things a certain way because you are the same kind of thought process as them. 

For instance, my boyfriend and I are the same kind of crazy.  We both have never been married.  We both have the same kind of ideas about business and life.  We understand each other and when the other gets into their craziness, we would say, “I understand because I’m like you”.  It doesn’t mean we have to share the same passions or the same hobbies.  It is deeper than that.  It is an understanding that is about the other person’s nature. 

So is there someone for everyone?  I would say, wholeheartedly, yes.  There is someone out there with the same kind of crazy as you.  The interesting part is figuring out how to find this person.  Huummmm!!!!!  Any comments?

The Singles Cycle

You may be wondering when the singles industry starts getting revved up and when does it slow down.  Having been in the industry for over 5 years now, I have been watching these trends and find it very interesting. 

When is the most activity when it comes to singles coming out to date?  November is the best month.  It is right before the holidays and people don’t want to be alone.  The winter and the spring are the busiest times for singles companies as the holidays are here, the new year’s resolutions come around and then there is Valentine’s Day where singles find themselves again home alone with a good movie and popcorn.  Spring there isn’t much going on so it is a good time to go out and do something.   

Summertime is the slowest for singles companies as singles are preoccupied with vacations and their kids being home from school.  It almost virtually dies in the summertime.  However, come November and all the way through April, things start to get cranking.

So if you are single, I would start attending singles events in November or put a profile on the Internet.  We are coming up on our busiest times so go out and remember the cardinal rule.  Have fun!!!!  Leave your serious side at home.

Being the third wheel

Have you ever been the third wheel?  If you are single, most likely this has happened to you more than once.  All my friends had hooked up with boyfriends and they would continuously ask me to join them to do things with them.  I declined simply because I was uncomfortable being the third wheel.  I really do not like it.  It seems to have happened to me so much in my life that I just simply don’t like it.  Some of my single friends, though, don’t mind being the third wheel.  They are always doing something with their married friends.  And there are some friends who are a couple and I don’t mind being with them.  I don’t know what the difference is.  Maybe it is because some friends show their affection for each other in front of you, which isn’t bad but it sure makes you feel alone and really single. 

So that is my take on being the third wheel.  Any comments?